Carry on Beautiful!

I’ve just read a post on a different blog that I’m not going to link back to because i think everything it said was, frankly, a load of baloney. In this post a woman was talking about something she wanted her two young daughters to know, that soul mates aren’t real. Of course, I’m not going to discuss whether they are or not because i am in no way intelligent enough to put forth any argument other than ‘well i think they are’, what i want to discuss here is what exactly a soul mate is.

This specific post had a somewhat click bate-y title, hence why i ended up reading it (it also had Donal Trump advertisements if thats anything for you to go by) and the basic theme of the post is ‘A soul mate completes you and you can’t be completed by anything other than love of God’. I disagree with that greatly.

If you believe in God, thats cool, you do you. I think its awesome that you have faith and i wouldn’t ever argue against you as long as you don’t argue with me about my religion, or lack there of. What i would argue with this though, is that a soul mate isn’t some who ‘completes’ you.

I would consider my boyfriend to be my soulmate. You could argue that I’m young and naive, and maybe you are right, but at this very moment while I’m sat on my bed with the sound of him playing video games in the bedroom, i truly, whole heartedly believe he is my soul mate. But he doesn’t complete me.

I don’t need completing, I’m not a jigsaw puzzle or a tricky math equation, I’m a person who has my own thoughts, opinions, morals and feelings. I know who i am and I’m fully myself, theres no part of me missing ready for prince charming to slot into and suddenly turn me into a full person because i already am a full person.

A soul mate is someone who understands you and by understanding you, understands you’re not perfect and loves you anyway. A soul mate is someone who respects you and who has also earnt your respect in return. A soul mate is someone who supports you even if they don’t think it will work out and who isn’t afraid to tell you when your dress looks terrible, but are still able to do it in a nice way.

A soul mate is someone who shares some of your loves but also has their own and sometimes you just have to go off separately and do your own thing for a few hours because you’re not completing each other, you’re complimenting each other. Your soulmate isn’t the final ingredient to your recipe, they’re the ingredient thats missing from the recipe because everyone thinks it’ll ruin it but when its thrown in, it become something even more incredible than it was before.

A soul mate should improve your life but not complete you. You are not incomplete. No matter how broken you feel you are, all the pieces are there, you might just need someone to help hold them together while you glue them up. That person is your soul mate. They should be supporting you while you support them so that you can find all the pieces you thought were missing, all of which are inside of you, not them.

Perhaps to some people, God is the third soul mate in that relationship, to many I’m sure He is what holds them up together and reminds them to speak kindly during arguments and thats fine, i can accept and respect that but i don’t think that anyone should be told God is their missing piece just like no one should be told a boy/girl will be their missing piece to complete them.

-Dana