Before You Get A Cat….

Before you get a cat, you should know that they’re not as cute as they seem. You will get scratched and bitten and hissed at. They’re not cute little fluff balls, they will wake you up at six in the morning on a Sunday meowing at the end of your bed because they want food even though they don’t usually get breakfast until at least half eight. They’re loud and obnoxious and they head butt you in the boobs with the strength of ten cats.

img_2306Before you get a cat you should know that it doesn’t matter if you literally changed their litter box five seconds ago, they will poo in the gas cupboard or wee under the stairs or vomit right in the middle of the kitchen where you don’t notice it until you’ve stepped in it and wondered why your sock is wet.

Before you get a cat you should know that they sleep more than you ever could purely so that the second you try to sleep they can run around, knock everything down and make it sound like some one unleashed a herd of fifty rampaging bulls into your living room. Your favourite picture frame will be smashed off the top shelf and they will somehow manage to knock a plate out of a closed cupboard. I don’t know how they do these things but they do, believe me.img_0280Before you get a cat you should know that they’re clingy and, even if they always look a bit grumpy, they will sit on you for hours if you offer them a hug and a scratch on the chin. They will seem way too smart for cats when they can tell that you need them to just sit near you as a tiny fluffy comfort blanket on a rough day and the way they look at you when you give them some chicken after you finish your meal will make waking up early to give them breakfast more than worth it.

Before you get a cat you should know they’re not ‘just an animal’, they become a part of your family, a confidant that can never tell your secrets and even if they could you’d still trust them not to. They’re smarter than you could ever believe and they one hundred percent think they’re better than you because in most peoples cases, my own included, they probably are.

Before you get a cat, you should know they’re lovable little shits that just want love, just like the rest of us.

-Dana

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