Carry on Beautiful!

I was born on the 28th of March 1997, meaning that I am now 21 years old. Thats insane right? Look at me, I’m a real adult now! We all know you never really feel any different when you wake up on your birthday whether you’re 13, 18 or 21, but I kind of felt like I should.

Of course, over here in the UK I’ve been able to legally drink for three years now, so theres not really any big changes like there are for 21 year olds in the USA. 21 feels almost like a pointlessly huge celebration. I enjoyed it, having a surprise party thrown for me is definitely something I appreciated and loved, but I just don’t get why its such a big deal.

Some people my age are finishing university, which I’m not. Others have a job, which I don’t. I simultaneously feel incredibly grown up but also like a child still. I’m an adult who’s done the adult things all the wrong way around. I smoked my first cigarette before drinking my first beer, moved out of my parents before getting a job, ended up in a serious and long term relationship with the first person I ever kissed. None of those are bad (except maybe the first one), but I feel like I’ve done things the ‘wrong way’.

If theres anything I’ve learnt from being alive this long though, its that theres no wrong way if its the way you want. If its the way that makes you happy or at least brings you closer to happiness. Things aren’t always perfect, I’m a mess most of the time and struggle with the things everyone else seems able to do so effortlessly and sometimes I get so caught up on that and feel like utter shit, but for the most part I know that I’m at least trying to find the path that will lead to happiness. Maybe I’m jumping about doing everything wrong while watching everyone else walk past getting happier each day, but in the end I’ll probably reach the destination I need.

Life is hard, its hard for everyone though some don’t choose to show it. Everyone has bad days or weeks, struggles to do something they feel they should be able to or fails over and over at something they’re putting so much effort in. Thats the nature of life, we’re all trying our best and we (we as in humans) need to just all give ourselves and each other a break, and thats what I intend to do as a 21 year old. I’m going to be more forgiving, to others and myself. More loving, to others and myself. More supportive, to others and myself.

-Dana