My dad was born on March 3rd 1952, in a tiny village in Denmark. He went on to travel, sailing around the world, and even getting banned from New York for having a communist book with him. He learnt how to practice hypnotherapy, and other alternative therapies, and set up his own business to help people.
He loved fiercely, believed in equality for all, and always fought for the under dog. Anytime I wanted to try something new he gave me the resources, and encouragement, to give it my best go. He supported me even when he didn’t agree with my choices, tried his best to guide me down the right paths without ever telling me what to do with my life.
He let me grow into my own person, and made me feel good about who that person was. He accepted and loved me fully, with no hesitation, no matter the situation.
He also made mistakes that affected the whole family negatively, he had mental health issues that he struggled to overcome. He could be so annoying it made me want to scream, and he could get angry and scream back in an instant.
He’d take forever to do things, vanish right when you needed him and insist we start doing things like moving around the house or go food shopping at 9pm when we were all just ready to relax.
He was frustrating, difficult and annoying.
He was loving, caring and giving.
When someone dies, we often only talk about the good things about them. In the years since my dad died people have only said nice things about him, so on his birthday I want to say the good and the bad.
It was his good and bad parts that made him who he was, my dad. We’re all an amalgamation of things both good and bad, that doesn’t change when we die. My dad was a million different things, and plenty of them were negative things, and I wouldn’t have had him be any other way because he was MY dad, and there’s no one else like him.
He was flawed and brilliant and even without him here I learn from him. I’d do anything to get to have him for longer than I did, but I’d take having him for any amount of time over having anyone else as my dad.
I’m not someone that still buys cards or presents for dead loved ones, but I wanted his birthday to be acknowledged somewhere. I want people to know my dad was brilliant.
So Happy Birthday Dad, I love you.