I’ve been with Rich for almost seven years now, and though we have our ups and downs like all relationships, I feel like that’s long enough that I’ve learnt a few things that are necessary in keeping a relationship strong, and keeping everyone involved happy!
Let Things Go
I don’t mean this as in just be a doormat and let your partner walk all over you, but when something comes up and you’ve had an argument, or even just an emotionally driven discussion, once that’s over, you need to let it go. Bringing up things that happened however long ago in an argument or discussion just leaves your partner feeling attacked, and like their mistakes are hovering over them!
Bring Things Up
This sounds a bit like the opposite of my first point, but it’s not! If your partner has done something that’s upset or angered you, bring it up either then and there, or whenever it’s next appropriate to do so. Keeping quiet everytime is just going to lead to a blow up! No one likes being given a list of things they’ve done to hurt or anger their partner, but a quick ‘hey, I didn’t like this’ right when it happens is a lot easier to calmly deal with.
Bring Everything up
We all hear about not bottling up our feelings, but we often only talk about the negative feelings. A quick ‘thanks for doing the dishes’, or ‘I love that jumper you’re wearing’, or even a little ‘it’s so sweet of you to water the plant I forgot about’ will cheer anyone up, and especially in a relationship, there should always be more praise than complaints.
Make Time for Each Other
Some days I go into work tired because I stayed up late to see Rich, or sometimes he’ll forgo seeing his friends or going for a beer (especially this year lmao) so we can fit in an extra couple of hours together. Most importantly, it’s time we actually spend together, purely for each other. When we really are busy, maybe we have a laugh while doing the shopping, or the dishes. Find time to just laugh together and ask how each other are doing, even if you’re tidying the house together!
I definitely think these are the main ways Rich and I continue to work as a couple and make each other happy, but if you have any tips of your own I’d love to hear them!